Middle East Loses What Little Was Left of Its Sanity

A few weeks ago, 14 squirrels equipped with espionage systems of foreign intelligence services were captured by [Iranian] intelligence forces along the country's borders. These trained squirrels, each of which weighed just over 700 grams, were released on the borders of the country for intelligence and espionage purposes. According to the announcement made by Iranian intelligence officials, alert police officials caught these squirrels before they could carry out any task.

- Iranian newspaper

Word spread among the populace that UK troops had introduced strange man-eating, bear-like beasts into the area to sow panic.

But several of the creatures, caught and killed by local farmers, have been identified by experts as honey badgers.
...
UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer said: "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.

- Iraqi rumor

"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area."
That is just the most godly quote ever.


Aww, aren't they cute? You'd never know they're man-eating badgers of death!